I Will Find You
by ibelieveinjohnlock
Summary: Olivia is finally with the man she's wanted for years, even though he's left the squad. Their lives together are perfect, until a criminal from Benson and Stabler's past comes back to haunt them. And Stabler must do everything to get her back.
1. Chapter 1

The jury always seemed to take forever to deliberate with each other, but finally they were called back into the courtroom. Olivia Benson hurried back into the courtroom and took her seat. After everyone was seated, the jury filed back in and they all sat down.

"On the count of rape in the first degree, has the jury reached a verdict?" the judge said.

"Your honor, on the charge of rape in the first degree, the jury remains unable to reach a unanimous decision," the juror replied.

"Very well. I accept your verdict," the judge said. "On count two, has the jury reached a verdict?"

"On the charge of assault in the second degree, we find the defendant not guilty." the juror declared.

Instantly the courtroom rioted, some yelling obscenities. The judge pounded his gavel three times.

"Order! Order in the courtroom!" He shouted.

After a few moments everyone quieted down. Olivia listened intently for the jury's verdict on the last charge.

"On count three, what say you?" the judge continued.

"On the charge of unlawful imprisonment in the second degree, we find the defendant guilty," the juror responded.

Olivia smiled inwardly, got up and left the room. At least they'd gotten the bastard on one of the charges.

Olivia arrived back at the precinct twenty minutes later. She had hoped to get him on all three charges, but at least he wasn't let off completely. She sighed inwardly, wishing Elliot was here; she hoped he was coming back. The shoot out at the precinct seemed to have traumatized him more than it had Olivia. But she couldn't blame him. If he hadn't have shot Jenna, who knows who else would be dead? She threw her things on her desk, ready to sit for a moment, but before she could, Captain Cragen called her into his office.

"Liv? My office, for a moment," He called.

Slowly she walked into his office.

"Would you shut the door please?" Cragen said quietly, and she turned, and quickly shut the door.

Cragen had a grim look on his face, and Olivia could feel a knot of anxiety starting to form in her stomach. He looked at her for a moment, and then he spoke.

"Elliot put his papers in. There was nothing I could do."

Olivia felt her heart drop into her stomach, and she stared at Cragen for a short while, trying to comprehend what he just said. Her mouth seemed sealed shut and her eyes stung with impending tears.

"He's earned it," She said quietly.

"And then some," He replied. "You wanna talk?"

She slightly shook her head.

"No."

"You wanna take a day?" He asked her.

"No."

"Liv, I'm sorry."

At that moment, Rollins walked in.

"Got a ten thirty-four on Waverly." She said, glancing between them.

"Fin, take Rollins," Cragen called out into the precinct.

"No, I'll go," Olivia suddenly said. "Give me five, and we'll roll."

Rollins nodded, and walked out the door. Olivia followed her out. Her stomach was in knots and she felt a lump forming in her throat. Thinking quickly, she walked to an interrogation room, walked inside, and shut and locked the door behind her. She gripped the table hard, so hard that her knuckles turned white. Then she leaned against the wall, slid down, and let the tears fall. She wished that she had had a chance to speak to him before he left, she wished he hadn't left at all. And most of all, she wished that she had had the chance to tell him how she felt. But that would have to wait. She had a case to tend to.

Standing up, she wiped her eyes, opened the door, and headed for the bathroom. She splashed cold water on her face, and after she had dried it off, she headed back to her desk to grab her coat.

"Alright," she said to Rollins. "Let's go."

. . .

They had checked out the incident last night, nothing very serious. So Olivia went home. When she got there, she poured herself a glass of wine, and sat on her couch in the dark. She sat there reminiscing, trying to decide whether she should go see Elliot, and she burst into tears. The glass of wine shattered on the floor as Olivia clutched a pillow, trying to muffle her sobs.

She missed Elliot. She would miss working with him. And since he was gone, that would mean that she would be getting a new partner. She didn't want that. So she'd talk to Cragen about it whenever she went back into work.

She hurt all over. It hurt to think about Elliot. It hurt to think about getting a new partner. They had been partners for nearly fifteen years. She needed him. She depended on him, and he on her. It was going to hurt like hell to go into work tomorrow.

Taking deep breaths, she slowly calmed herself down. As soon as she started breathing normally, she cleaned up the mess and headed to her bedroom, stripped off her clothes, and fell into bed.

Olivia woke the next day around noon. Getting up out of bed seemed like the hardest thing in the world to do...but she managed it. Locating her wallet and phone, she remembered that she had Elliot's cell number. Her finger hovered over the call button for a moment, but then she snapped the phone shut and threw it on her bed.

When she got to the kitchen, she made herself a cup of coffee and some toast and sat on her couch. She deliberated further on whether she should go see Elliot, and she made her decision after a few minutes of going through the pros and cons.

She was going to go see Elliot.


	2. Chapter 2

Olivia hurriedly threw jeans and a clean sweater on, then searched for her phone and called Cragen.

"You know…"She hesitated for a moment. "I think I do need a day, Captain…."

"Alright, Liv. Take it easy," He replied. "Do you need anything?"

"No, but thanks," She said quickly, then hung up the phone.

Gathering her things, she walked out of her apartment, and shut and locked the door behind her. She was pretty sure she knew where Elliot lived.

When she got into her car, she sat there for a moment, thinking about what to do. She thought about what she was going to say to him, but she was afraid she would burst into tears if she opened her mouth. Fighting back tears, she gripped the steering wheel tighter and focused on the road ahead of her.

. . .

Olivia stood at Elliot's door, her heart pounding with nervousness. What would he say to her? Would he even speak to her? She took a deep breath, and knocked on his door.

There was a few moments of silence, then she heard him turning the locks, and the door swung open.

Elliot stood there in his robe, and Olivia's throat hitched at the sight of him. She opened her mouth to say something, but nothing would come out.

"Liv? What are you doing here?" He asked. "Come in."

She moved past him, going to sit on his old blue couch. Elliot sat across from her, watching her.

"I….I just came….to see you," She stuttered. "Why…."

Olivia couldn't continue, and putting her head in her hands, she started crying.

"Liv…" she heard Elliot say, and then the couch creaked as he sat down beside her and gathered her into his arms.

She sobbed into his shoulder. She didn't want to lose him as her partner; she didn't want to lose him at all.

Olivia loved him. She wanted so badly to say something to him about it, but he was still married. And when he and Kathy were going to get divorced, she thought it would have the perfect opportunity. But they got back together, and Olivia didn't really think that he felt the same towards her.

"I don't….want you to...leave," She choked out. "Call me selfish...but I don't want another partner. I want you."

Elliot pulled back to look at her and cradled her face in his hands.

"Liv...after what happened with Jenna….I just can't come back," He said. "I just can't get the image out of my head…."

"I know….I know…" Olivia replied. "I just don't want to lose you...I mean...no one at the precinct wants you to leave."

She knew she was blushing hard.

Elliot smiled at her.

"You aren't going to lose me, Liv," He said softly, then did something that shocked the hell out of Olivia.

He kissed her.

Olivia's heart jumped in her chest, with joy or shock she didn't know, but she kissed him back, her palms pressed against his firm chest. Her heart felt like it was going to burst out of chest, because it was beating so hard. Elliot broke the kiss and leaned his forehead against hers.

"You aren't ever going to lose me, Olivia. I….I love you. I always have, since a little after we became partners. But...I was married to Kathy, and I couldn't be unfaithful to her," He said.

She pulled away from him.

"Where is Kathy now?" She asked, then glanced at his hand. He wasn't wearing his wedding ring.

"At her mother's," He sighed. "She couldn't take it anymore, so she left. But to be honest….I'm kind of glad. It means I can finally have you."

Her heart leapt with joy, and she leaned in and kissed him. Elliot pulled her into his lap, and she wrapped her legs around him. Deepening the kiss, Elliot slid his hand into her hair and gripped it tightly. Breaking the kiss, he moved down and lightly pressed kisses to her neck. Olivia shivered, and he chuckled darkly against her neck.

"Sensitive?" He asked, and she nodded.

He bit her neck, and she gasped. Elliot pushed her onto her back, laying on top of her. She could feel the evidence of his arousal as he ground against her, and she could feel the need growing inside her. He captured her lips with his, his tongue seeking entrance. Olivia relented, savoring the taste of him. This was what she wanted for so long, what she'd wished for for a long time.

And it was finally happening.

Elliot ground his pelvis against hers, and she could feel what seemed to be his enormous dick press against her core. Olivia wrapped her legs around his waist to pull him closer, wanting him badly.

 _Wait,_ she thought. _I need him...but we shouldn't do this yet. I want to, but we should take it slow._

"El...Elliot," She panted, stopping the kiss. "We shouldn't...do anything more than this...yet. We should...take it slow,"

Elliot pulled back slowly, and looked at her. Then he smiled.

"Yeah," He said quietly. "I suppose you're right."

They both sat up, and Elliot pulled Olivia into his lap. Tucking her head under his chin, she placed her hand on his chest, over his heart. She was beyond happy; she was in heaven. Elliot was holding her, and she felt so safe in his arms.

"Don't you have to go in today?" Elliot asked suddenly.

"No," She replied. "Cragen gave me the day off….he seemed to know that I'd need it after he told me that you put your papers in."

Elliot was silent for a moment.

"I'm sorry, Liv….I wanted to tell you myself, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I thought it would be better…." He trailed off.

Olivia looked up at him.

"It's okay, El," She said, smiling. "I'm not angry. I'm just so happy that you feel the same way about me that I do about you. I never thought I'd end up having you. On my way here, I was scared that you wouldn't want to see me and that I'd lose you forever…."

A tear slipped down her cheek, and Elliot wiped it away.

"Hey, hey. Look at me," He said gently, cradling her face in his hands.

"I'm not going anywhere, I promise. You're stuck with me," He told her, cracking a grin.

She smiled back at him, and nestled down into his arms again.


	3. Chapter 3

Elliot had been holding her for what seemed like hours. They had moved to his bedroom a while ago, and they had both fallen fast asleep. Olivia woke a few hours later, and she could barely see the little bit of sun that was peeking in through the window.

 _It must be around 5 or 6_ , she thought.

Olivia was lying on Elliot's chest, listening to his heartbeat. Every so often she would glance up, and just stare at his face. He looked so peaceful when he was sleeping. She wondered what he could be dreaming about. She was a bit stiff from lying in the same position for so long, but she didn't want to wake him by moving. It was hurting a bit though.

She slowly moved away from him, and carefully got up off the bed. She headed to the bathroom. After she used it, she washed her hands and went back to Elliot's bedroom. Elliot was sitting up up against the headboard. He smiled when he saw her.

"I thought you left," He said. "But then I heard you in the bathroom."

"Sorry. You had sort of a death grip on me, and I needed to pee," She replied.

He smiled again, and patted the spot on the bed beside him. Olivia moved to him, and sat beside him, curling against him. She sighed as his warmth enveloped her. Elliot started stroking her hair, almost lulling her to sleep.

"Liv?" Elliot asked quietly. "Can you stay the night?"

Olivia was silent for a moment, thinking it over.

"Yes," She replied. "I do have to go into the precinct tomorrow, so I'll have to leave early."

"That's fine," Elliot said, and she looked up at him.

She stared into his deep blue eyes, and he stared back.

"I'll sleep so much easier now that I have you with me," He whispered.

Olivia's eyes filled with tears, and she sat up and threw her arms around him, burying her face in his neck.

"Whoa, Liv, what's wrong? What did I say?" He said, confused.

She leaned backward, and smiled at him.

"Elliot…." she choked out. "I love you. I love you so much."

He held her face in his hands, and brought her forehead forward to meet his.

"I love you, too, Olivia, more than you will ever know," Elliot murmured to her, sounding like he was choking back tears as well.

They stayed like that for a few moments, but they were interrupted by the sound of Olivia's stomach growling. They both laughed.

"Have you eaten anything today?" He asked.

"No…" She admitted. "I was more focused on coming to see you…"

"Alright," He said, a smile tugging at his lips. "I'll order a few pizzas for us then."

Olivia noticed that he seemed to be smiling so much more. It made him look younger, and more relaxed. She was glad that she was having that effect on him. She was happy, no, she was ecstatic that she finally had Elliot.

She moved off of him to let him go get his phone, and she snuggled down under the covers, inhaling the scent that he left behind. Olivia could see herself spending every night here. Elliot walked back into the bedroom, and slid under the covers with her, spooning against her.

"They said it should be here between thirty and forty five minutes from now," He said, his voice muffled against her neck.

Olivia shivered lightly. Elliot pulled her closer, draping his arm over her waist. They both felt content, and safe, and happy.

"If you want to go back to sleep for a bit, I'll wake you up when the pizza gets here," Elliot whispered.

"Alright," She said, closing her eyes.

It didn't take her long to drift off to sleep, wrapped in Elliot's arms.


	4. Authors Note

Hey, everyone. Just a quick authors note. My stepfather is cancelling our mobile phone contract and my phone is what I use for a wifi hotspot. I still have school but I have school work to focus on too. I should be getting a new phone with a new contract soon, and I promise I'll try not to take forever with new chapters. I'm currently working on Chapter 4 as fast as I can and ill have it up as soon as possible. Thanks~!


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